Questions that You Might Find If You’re A Balinese and Hindu

9:05 PM

First disclaimer: this article is just for fun. Don’t be so serious.

Brother, cousins, and I were having Metatah ceremony. It's like manicure - but on your teeth.

Here are some common questions I find from being a Hindu-Balinese (yes, find, not found, since until know some people still ask those questions); and also the answer my alter ego would give to them.

What does your Balinese name mean? Are you first or second child in the family?
First daughter…
…of the House Targaryen, the First of Her Name, the Unburnt, Queen of Meereen, Queen of the Andals and the Rhoynar and the First Men, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons.
I shall handle you my family tree if you want. No?

It must be cool to live in Bali. You can go to the Beach every day!
What? No, I’m not going to the beach every day. Unless I’m interested in turning into a bacon.

So what are you doing in your spare time? Partying?
Helping my mom’s sister’s brother-in-law’s mother’s cousin who happened to be my neighbor, who is preparing a ceremony for his children, nephews, and nieces.

What food do you miss the most from your hometown?
Babi guling (suckling pig). I am willing to travel 2 hours to Rawamangun just to eat a plate of it, even if I know I will still go home in a disappointment because it is not as good as what we have in Bali.

Long holiday! You must be excited to go home. It’s Bali!
Yaiy! It’s Bali! And long holiday! Do you know what it means?
Airplane seats will be fully booked, promo fare will be closed. Nah, I think I’ll just wander around the city with Transjakarta. I’ll go home after the long holiday with my annual leave. I’ll be taking care all of your work while you are taking selfie with your bikini that you can’t wear in Jakarta.

What did you do when Nyepi?
If you were not allowed to go out, not allowed to light any ‘fire’, not allowed to work, and not allowed to entertain yourself, what would you do?

Err…escape from Bali?
Shallow. *flipping hair*

Then, what did you do?
Play dead.

Can I hear you talking with that ‘t’ accent?
Can I smack your face first?

There are people who will always curious of my cultural identity. But thanks to them, I could feel special.

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